BEING FULLY PRESENT ON YOUR WEDDING DAY
As a bride, it is easy to get caught up in making sure all of your wedding day details are absolutely perfect. Trust me, I still remember having a conversation with my MOH about how the linen napkins would match the bridesmaid dresses. haha! But, those details are nothing if you are not truly enjoying your wedding day. So, I spent a lot of time making sure Ryan and I were setting ourselves up to get the most out of the experience. There are some things that I'm sure I stressed over way to much. These are details that most people probably didn't notice (like the napkins), and parts that I can't even remember. But, there are other things that were crucial in allowing us to really enjoy our day, and were worth the extra attention. So, I wanted to share those things with you.
Firstly, I found it super helpful to delegate tasks beforehand. It led to a lot of stress in the last three weeks before the wedding. But, when the big day arrived, I wasn’t worried about the logistics. I needed those things to be out of my mind so I could be fully present. This was possible because we have an unbelievably supportive group of family and friends. Seriously, guys, I love you so much. I spent a lot of time before the wedding giving people I could trust small wedding week/day jobs. For example, a groomsman held onto my gift to Ryan and gave it to him the morning of the wedding. And, my right-hand gal made sure Copper was taken care of that day and brought him to us for pictures that afternoon (HUGE help). Another close friend made sure the food trays got to their designated locations for lunch. A bridesmaid had pre-labeled envelopes so that no wedding day payment was missed. The list goes on! Did I mention I love these people? It worked well to not overwhelm any one person (or take on all of this myself) because I wanted them to enjoy the day too!
It is also important to hire a team of vendors you can trust. I cannot stress this enough. It is so important to connect with your vendors, no matter what product or service they provide! If they “get” you they will better serve you. I know it isn’t always possible to know this upon booking (we did have unforeseen issues with vendors we didn’t know well), but go with your gut. Look at samples of what they do, research them, meet with them, and don’t just assume that the cheapest option will be the best option for you. Budgets are important, but you can’t always put a price on the vendor that is a perfect fit. During the planning process, I made sure that each vendor had the information/tools that they asked for and needed. This open communication is key for everyone to be on the same page. By the time the wedding day arrived, they had ALL of my trust. All of it. I was not worried in the slightest about what they were doing, because I trusted they would deliver in the best way they knew how.
Another thing to remember (as I’m sure you have heard before) is that there WILL be mishaps. All of the delegating and planning paid off big time because things generally ran very smoothly, and we were both able to enjoy the day to full capacity. But, you know what happened? Ryan was on his way to meet me before the ceremony because we had planned to share a quiet moment and read the letters we wrote to each other. As he rounded the corner, he misstepped off of the sidewalk and rolled his ankle. My poor groom went down. He was hiding a limp for the rest of the day, as his foot swelled up in his shoe. We laugh about it now (mostly because it’s a funny story) but also because we thought we had imagined everything that could have possibly gone wrong (and did everything we could to prevent those things), but never did it cross our minds that anyone would get hurt.
Lastly, I want to remind you to s l o w d o w n . People always say this, but I want to talk about how exactly we did it. Weddings are busy, and it is easy to be pulled in different directions during it all, so you want to make sure you are actively spending the day together. Instead of letting your mind wander to the thing that's about to happen next, focus on what is happening now. Ryan and I promised each other beforehand that we would take the time to be present. He was so much better at this than I was. I remember him grabbing my hand at the reception, and pulling me to the side of the dance floor. He told me to pause, look around and take it in. And, we stood there together doing just that. I don’t know if anyone noticed, and until I wrote this, no one even knew. But, in that moment it was just us, in our own world, quietly taking it all in while our reception boomed around us. That moment still means everything to me. So, do the things on your wedding day that mean everything to you.
Thoughts on how to be fully present on your wedding day? Comment below!